Have You Checked The Children?

Now I think I've seen it all. Has the movie industry gotten so lame that we need to remake mediocre 1970's horror movies?

A remake of "When a Stranger Calls"(1979)? Are you fucking kidding me?
I think Hollywood needs to get it's head examined to dip back into this well.

I saw the original when I was a kid and was never impressed enough to rewatch this movie again and I was a horror movie junkie. This is a one trick pony, gimmick movie, nothing more. If you think that knowing what was going to happen for 2 hours is suspensful, then this movie is right up your alley. Plus in this age of cellphones, is it really a surprise when you find out that the creepy calls are coming from inside the house?

I guess I should have seen the writing on the wall when Peter Jackson took an amazingly mediocre movie "King Kong" (1933,1976) and made it 3 hours long. As if the story wasn't insufferable and unbelievable enough. There's a reason why the movie took 43 years to be remade in 1976. We weren't due for more King Kong schlock until 2019. I was really hoping that I would be dead by then, thereby escaping it.

Now, we get a 2nd rate horror movie like "Stranger" remade.

If the kids want to see this movie, do yourself a favor and pick up the original in a cutout bin and watch it at home, where it would probably be that much scarier.

What's next?... "Prom Night" (1980, holy shit...it looks like it was remade in 2005!) and "Sleepaway Camp"(1983)? What tripe. If this movie grosses more than 25M, it will prove that we are a bunch of retarded lemmings headed for the cliff.

Now, a "Don't Look In The Basement" (1973) remake....I'd be up for that! ("You bad....you killed Dr, Stevens and broke my boat...you bad...). A true classic. I'm going to use a future post to document my favorite lines from that one! Hell, why stop there, let's remake "Dementia 13" (1963) and "Barbed Wire Dolls" (1975), while were at it.

Yummy, nothing beats movies about caged women.