Apparently, Yankee management is less than pleased with Alex Rodriguez after his plane went skidding off of a runway at Bob Hope Airport in California while failing to yield any fatalities."I gave him a boxcutter and told him that there would be no room for him on the 2007 roster, unless he was willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for Allah. I promised him a roomful of plump virgins if he could bring his plane down possibly in the middle of the A's-Tigers game or at least at a shopping mall of some sort where capitalist pigs meet to idol worhip. So what happens??? The useless son of an infidel whore, falls and cuts himself with the boxcutter before the plane even takes off and then it skids to a halt to rush him to a hospital. No wonder why the bloated pig can't field a ground ball at third. He's pathetic."
Osama planned on waiving A-Rod after his untimely death, much as he did with Cory Lidle but will now have to look for another opportunity.
A-Rod had no comment other to assure the press that he considers himself part of the "solution".
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