An Open Letter To David Wright

Dear David,

Nothing personal, but your play in the NLCS is giving me ass cancer.

So far, the Mets have been able to get to Game 7 pretty much without you but we need you real bad tonight.

You see, Jeff Suppan is a frigging poser bitch who needs his old ass roughed up big time. Tony LaRussa's Cardinals have no business getting this far, regardless of the fact that our pitching has been decimated by injuries.

C'mon David, you're my man and I would really like to see you line the first pitch you see right up Suppan's rectum for an inside the park homerun. I'm so confident that you'll come through that I Fed-Exed Yader Molina a pair of forceps to help Suppan "give birth" on the mound while you're getting your curtain call.

Go METS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for listening, your #1 fan,
Cockadoodie Bluey