"Awww...Mom!...You're Running Your Fingers Through His Back Hair!!!"

I'm a pretty hairy guy. Maybe not as hairy as the gorilla to the right, but you get the picture.

A few years ago, I started Nairing my back in the summers to keep from getting locked up in a zoo. But, before I began this seasonal grooming ritual, I had a healthy back beard. My friends used to chide me about looking like an ape, but at the time, I just couldn't be bothered.

About 4 years ago, my buddy Meersky (who is a big proponent of "policing the area" or getting rid of unwanted hair) and I, were helping my other buddy, Irish's Mom move some furniture out of the house to the curb for trash pickup. Usually, in the summers, especially on hot days, I wear a tank top that is cut pretty thin and doesn't cover my shoulders or most of my back. On that particular day, I was wearing a skimpy tank top. After we were done, Irish's Mom was so thankful that she gave me a big hug. Irish was standing right behind me and shrieked in horror the title quote.

Of course, Meersky and I have gotten a lot of mileage out of that story and Irish's eye starts to twitch every time I wear a tank top and I get near his mother.

It happened again a few months ago but my back was smooth as a baby's bottom and Irish was nowhere to be seen. But, we told him anyway and it evoked pretty much the same cringing response.